St. Anthony's Tri Race Recap

This was supposed to be an "A" race. My nutrition was locked in, I had been running like I'd never run before  and I have practically swam a 5k everyday for the past month.(My swim workouts typically range from 4600-4800 hundred but shockingly enough, the little bit of type "A" I have can only end on 4500 or 5000 never 4450 or 4950).

 Making the jump between elite age grouper to rookie pro has been a rough road with many things out of my control happening. Now I was going to tow the line with Olympians and world champions. I felt like an ant against giants but have put in the time, done the work and earned my spot on the line and was mentally prepared to race like hell. I was actually excited and felt so empowered.

Shit balls, was I humbled when I picked up a 35lb bike bag and pulled my rhomboid and trap at the airport en route to FL. Seriously?! I did crossfit all winter, I can squat my weight (I may have lied about my weight) I should be strong as an ox and able to throw that 35lbs across the room-but I won't cause my Fezzari is my baby and I could've been arrested for child abuse. Now I'm just carrying 12lbs of extra muscle slowing me down on the run and I can't lift my bike. I looked like this....
                                  

"STAY POSITIVE" I was screaming to myself while maybe having a little breakdown at the airport and contemplated heading home. I got 2 massages at the airport during my 3 hour delay. I still couldn't move my....anything.

Landed in FL, headed straight to packet pick up. It was closing - begged a massage therapist to stay and work on me. I begged so much and so hard it would've been super awkward had he said "no" and besides that I don't take being told "no" very well so it would've gotten even more awkward. He mine as well just said no and sent me on my way, it didn't help and I wasted $12 for 10 minutes of work. Ugh, why is Dr. Tom in Utah and when do I become some superstar and have a doctor on staff with me all the time? What, never? Shit balls.

Headed to my friends house about 30 minutes away in silence. I called my coach trying super hard to fight back tears, I hate awkward situations and people thinking I'm a loose cannon-which I am. My coach, Bob Seebohar, is like a super genius and...well, I'm special. He's such genius that he's even smart enough to dumb things down for me and talk on a 5th grade level so I can follow the conversation and I don't even know he's doing it.  He's probably reading something about quantum physics and macro-nutrients while I'm blogging and watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians and learning about the "kegel master."

Anyways, I was so disappointed that he pretty much had to talk me off a cliff. He said this to me "Use this opportunity to develop your psychological capacity and skills to improve your disassociation between your mind and body. It begins tonight." That's basically a smart and fancy way of saying "HTFU" (harden the F up) okay, got it.


Later that night I tried Chinese cupping, sounds kinky right? It's that thing when little chinese midgets suck your back like leeches (I love Stefan on SNL)
                                  
 If you wanna read more about cupping heres the link. It helped SO much! Thanks Leslie for cupping me.

Felt awesome on race morning, I could move my head left to right but not up and down. That was progress. The swim was insane. With 8-10ft swells and not being able to hold my head up and sight I stayed with the pack for 750m and missed the turn...where the hell did everyone go? I saw one of the male pros and figured I must be doing super good! I couldn't believe I was going to beat Sara McLarty out of the water....(I hope you could hear the sarcasm) Every breath was painful and sighting was even more so, I tried to remember how pissed I was at my self at Nautica South Beach Tri for not pushing harder through a 3 foot swell, so I put my head down and fought against the ocean as hard as I could. I think this is what I looked like.

 I'm a  good pool swimmer but put me in swells with alligators or sharks and top it off  with pleurisy and I'm recipe for disaster. I'm looking for a sponsor to  provide me with a wave pool and stock it full of sharks and alligators. I strongly believe this will take my training to the next level.

Coming out of the water I knew I was gonna have to just put my head down and peddle as hard as I could and pray I didn't hit anything; I figured my chances were good since I crash more on the run. I made up about 5 mins on the bike but I'm positive I looked as crippled and just as hunch backed as these cute lil old folks minus the cute part, I probably looked more like an ogre on a bicycle but couldn't find any pictures of that online.

                                       
The run was mentally the hardest. My whole body was cramping and in pain. I don't get how anyone can run like this:
                                      
 As soon as I hit the finish line a wave of pain rushed through my body but I was only supposed to HTFU til the finish. Mission accomplished. I had a great race and did just what my coach told me to do. We were both proud. I ignored the pain and pushed through suck. We had to change my goals last minute, I adjusted my attitude until I hit the finish line where I dramatically fell over and cried.
                                                         

                                            

  That is most definitely not gatorade in my hand.

I had an awesome race, I met my goals.  Shit comes in 3's. That was 3. Time to gear up for 5150 Kansas and put it all together now.

Women's Professional Sweeper AKA Nautica South Beach Triathlon Recap

 My morning started off as usual, couldn't sleep, couldn't eat. Got to transition right when it opened. I was super excited to see place cards with my name on it in transition. It was like a super fancy dinner party for my bike but only not cause it was a race and bikes don't eat dinner. I tried to stay cool and pretend like I knew what I was doing, cause I'm a pro and should know this stuff but don't. Someone should right a book on this crap for rookie pros. Let me go back and explain where my confidence waiver-ed in this process.

Five weeks ago at training camp in AZ, 15 miles into a ride, I discovered some minor complications with my lungs that landed me in an ambulance on my way to the ER. (I'm fine) Breathing had been uncomfortable and felt like I was being stabbed in the chest. I was diagnosed with pleurisy, it's like fluid around your lungs making breathing hard and it hurts like a mo fo.

 Like an idiot I never followed up with my primary doctor upon returning home. Fast forward a couple weeks. My first pro race was ITU Sarasota. I couldn't breath in the swim (not anxiety or nerves, I was to star struck to be nervous), man was I humbled. I should've followed up with my doctor. DOH! I DNF'd in the water. Wise call after all my stupid ones. I'm a little thick headed.

So, ITU is a completely different game. Checking in your bike and waivers, meetings etc. There is just a different flow pre race and I just aimlessly followed people around who look like they knew what they were doing. I was totally creeping ;)

Fast forward again to Nautica SoBe Tri. I assumed transition would be so much different then as an AGer due to my 1st pro race experience in Sarasota. It's not.

The swim sucked, it was really just me. I expected to be out of the water in 21 mins, after some rough surf I was out about 5 mins later than expected. Shit balls. I was so happy to be headed to my bike and my happy place. I took a major blow seeing my lonely bike in T1 all by itself. I knew I was going to be chasing hard and I was. I was a little kweezy getting out of the water and was staggering like a drunk sailor in high heels. Took me a couple miles to get my stomach back and I was off.

The bike was fast, flat and uneventful. The run was not. It was like triathlon meets Spartan Race. Around mile 1 a little girl was the brunt of my knee to her head, putting us both on the ground after running in front of me in a busy area of the board walk. I stopped to make sure she was ok. I didn't know if I should tell someone or stay, keep running or what but standing there apologizing wasn't making matters any better. All I could think about was when Andrew Starykowicz ran into that volunteer in Abu Dhabi on his bike and got arrested for leaving and finishing the race. I did not want to go to jail in my little race suit! Who knows what would've happened to me in there wearing that. After a few minutes I was told to go and it'd be okay, so I went.

I tried running like I was running from the po po's but couldn't find my legs. Shit balls.

Around mile 4 I basically got clothes lined by another athlete knocking me off my feet again! Who the heck crashes twice-and even more so, who the heck crashes twice on the run course? I definitely could have been arrested for my knee jerk reaction, I may have hit him...more than once. I'm sorry for hitting you but you are still a jerk face. At this point positivity was out the window, so I pictured this:

It made me super duper happy, how can you not smile at that. It ultimately resulted in my first pro finish and big smiles.

A lot of things happened on race day that were out of my control, minus the swim-I just sucked. The point is that I'm super good at overcoming trials cause I get a lot of practice ;) I also proved to myself that I am great at sweeping the women's pro field. I should get paid to sweep. I think I would've won but volunteered to sweep and they didn't even give me a medal! Rude.

I'm a single mom of 4 who was crazy enough to dream of becoming a professional triathlete. My dream became a reality through tough work and dedication. I'm crazy enough to dream of making it to the top. I'm ready for the rough year ahead but I'm not going anywhere and am here to stay.

I was asked several times this weekend what my background was and my strength was. I haven't really known how to answer that question til now. I was never a swimmer, cyclist or runner. My back round is in being thick headed, stubborn and a good hard work ethic and my strength is transition and eating.

I had a great time, met great people, learned a lot about myself and loved this race. I'll be back next year and won't volunteer to sweep. Great job to everyone who raced! See ya next year!

This One is for You, Peter Rabbit Snickle Fritz Lotsa Pizza Oodles of Noodles Best

   I've waited sometime for my first pro race, before I had even gone pro. I've know that I always wanted to dedicated my first race as pro to my one and only and also big brother, Pete.

Dear Peter Rabbit Snickle Fritz Lotsa Pizza Oodles of Noodles Best,

   You and I have never seen eye to eye. You've been quite critical of me and I am easy to criticize. Growing up, you were the typical big brother never letting your little sister play with you and I was the pesky little sister who'd always try to keep up. Wether it was shooting hoops, skateboarding, going boating, or hanging on for dear life on the back of a jet ski. That auto tech class I took in high school was for you, and you never let me work on cars with you.

   You were never easy on me and held me to high standards that have more often than not been hard to reach. You were also a typical big brother by protecting me, like that time you wouldn't let Chad Miller get away with hitting me with his back pack walking home from the bus stop when I was in 5th grade. I will never forget the look on your face as you came running off your ginormous red cadillac of a riding lawn mower and let him have it after yelling at me to "get in the house." I truly feared for his life.

  The last time I was in FL was when I stuck my finger in the heated car cigarette lighter of a rental car as a little girl. You and Pops rushed to get me ice in the gas station and didn't complain of the burning flesh smell that remained that entire vacation until years later. Later, on that trip, like a typical big brother I clang to you for dear life on the back of that jet ski as you did the tightest and fastest donuts trying to get rid of me, in what I know now are alligator infested waters, and succeeded to throw me off. Burnt and bandaged finger in the air I swam as hard as I could with one arm to get to land all while screaming and crying, you made the longest and biggest U-turn possible to come pick me up.

  It seems fitting that I am back in Florida for my first race (ITU Sarasota) as a pro all grown up into a woman now. If it weren't for your tough love and forcing me to run hard and keep up, I would've given up on this dream long ago.

  Thank you for criticizing me, teaching me to be realistic, and patient, for making me build a back bone and never letting me run with the big boys.

  All these traits you've helped me build have come in handy this past year. I've been told by some that I'm not good enough, but I've been criticized before. I've been told that I will never be great  or my dreams are impossible but I have a back bone and realistic goals. I've struggled with injuries and illness but I have patience. I never caught up to you or the big boys because you forced me on my own path, thank you. I'm running my own game and chasing my own dreams now and you would literally never be able to keep up, or catch me. :) In 2 days, I'll be running with the big girls. I plan on needing all of these characteristic traits you helped instill in me to get me through my first race.

  Thank you, Peter Rabbit Snickle Fritz Lotsa Pizza Oodles of Noodles Best, for turning me into one hell of a stubborn fighter.

I love you big brother. This one's for you,
Ladybug Impy Best

I've Got a Confession

Last week my friend confessed some dirty little secrets in honor on Lance Armstrong coming clean and encouraged us to do the same. I am near perfect so it took me awhile to confess something. Here is what I came up with:

1. I live in Utah and don't ski or snowboard not because I'm "not aloud to" it's because I'm deathly afraid to get off the ski lift and WILL NOT get off. It's extremely embarrassing when they stop the lift and reverse it. While everyone on the lift is probably thinking "oh, some cute little kid was probably scared." Little do they know it's a grown adult. I have pure anxiety just typing this. 

2. I walk around my house mostly nude and now I know why my land lord would show up by surprise until he had a talking to and the mail is on my doorstep instead of in the box.

3. I am by far the laziest athlete you'll ever meet, I hate walking. If I can't get a parking spot close to the entrance of the building I'm going in, I will leave and come back later.

4. I never put my shopping cart in the shopping cart corral at the grocery store because I hate walking. The way I see it is I'm doing that bag boy a service and creating work for him to do and providing job security. Although at the time I get embarrassed when I leave it on the curb or in between cars and don't make eye contact with anyone and quickly get back in my car and take off.

5. I'm afraid of deer.I also believe that there are ghosts and sharks in the pool. 

The deer thing, they seem to be pretty attracted to me and I swear they are possessed by the devil.

Ghosts and sharks in the pool. I had kept this fear quiet and never told anyone until my girlfriend, Kristi Johnson (who races and coaches for Break Through Multisport) and I were talking about how a girl on her team had the same fear. I was so eager to know that somebody had the same concerns for their safety in the pool as me and quickly confessed that I had the same fear. I so excited to have my fear validated and was quickly told that she was like 10 years old. It's ridiculous, stemmed from nothing, and a complete irrational fear!

PROOF! That is definitely a ghost getting out of the pool.

I feel so much better! What do you need to confess?

My Quads. They're Kind of a Big Deal. And Crossfit

Pardon me if I butcher the lingo, but I maxed out my 1 rep front squat today at 135lbs! I really don't know if thats my "PR" since I cant remember what my 1 rep max was the first time I did it but I'm assuming so. I also guess it's kind of a big deal to be able to front squat as much as you weigh. I weigh in at 135lbs, 17% body fat. I didn't think it was very much till I had to squat it. Holy moly! If that's how to impress at CF I'm definitely losing weight!

I currently weigh 10lbs more than I did last season, I'm sure as the intensity builds and the strength training fizzles out of my regular training I will lose some of the weight but I'm honeslty happy with my body even with the added muscle weight. The only thing that fits me differently, well the same just tighter, is my jeans. They've always been huge in the waist and tight in my thighs. It's extreme now! I'm not called "Quadzilla" for nothin. Weight is just a number. There is a huge difference between 135 with 17% body fat and 135 with 35% body fat.

Triathletes are extremely opinionated about Crossfit and what's to much. I rarely RX my workouts and don't do it to compete. I'm wise in my training, except the time I was the only girl at the nooner and decided to RX and attempt to beat the boys WOD. That was stupid.

Between crossfit and swimming all strokes in the pool instead of just free has really improved my swim times. I swam my 1500m in 20:40! That's 4:20 off my fastest 1500. On top of that I'm finally get a lil 6 pack, like in the morning when I'm dehydrated from sleeping and have an empty stomach. After 4 kids I thought I'd never have a 6 pack, not cause I didn't eat healthy or was lazy. Clearly I work my butt off but because I had a diastasis recti. Diastasis recti is a separation between the left and right side of the rectus abdominis muscle, which covers the front surface of the belly area. In other words my 4 beautiful children ruined my body from the inside out by ripping my abdominal muscles apart. Cute little monsters they are.

So my swim as baller, my abs are healed and best of all, it's like an hour of kegels, your squeezing things you didn't know you had. When I walked into crossfit today the board said we were doing 50 jumping jacks as part of the warm up I thought "oh shit, where's the adult diapers." My kids also ruined my bladder which comes in handy at times, like racing when I need to pee and can just let it go without any problems on my bike or running...or in transition...or in my wetsuit or in the pool (you all do it too) I've got no issues. But peeing myself doing jumping jacks with crossfit athletes who don't give themselves a daily golden shower just wouldn't understand. Alright....here we go...I didn't pee myself!

So, Mommas, crossfit isn't just about lifting heavy weights and " beast modes," which p.s. my "best mode" is on all the time, you should see me putting on kids seat belts and wiping runny noses. It's impressive. It's about fixing your abdominal wall without surgery and kegels, which your significant others will thank you for too. Seriously has not only done UH-mazing things for my exterior but has also righted some wrongs on my interior-er.

If not peeing yourself when you sneeze ain't motivation enough for you then how about this.

Today, I didn't think I could front squat my body weight. I picked up the bar and got it on my chest(?) or shelf(?) or lack there of, i was shaking, my dainty little wrists hurt and I was nervous. After some peer pressure and my kids watching I put my big girl panties on, sacked up and did it. I took the risk and did it, I built strength from doing something I was afraid of and didn't think I could do.

Thanks everyone at today's nooner for not letting me puss out in front of my kids.

I love my big girls (my quads) and its moments like that, that I couldn't be more proud of my body.

Not Your Average Cheer Mom

Click here to check out how we pass the time before awards at my daughters cheer competition: Dance Dare at Cheer Competiton GO UPA!

Interview With Triple Threat Triathlon

Check out my interview with Collin Swenson from Triple Threat Triathlon here:

Click here for the dirty details!