Making the jump between elite age grouper to rookie pro has been a rough road with many things out of my control happening. Now I was going to tow the line with Olympians and world champions. I felt like an ant against giants but have put in the time, done the work and earned my spot on the line and was mentally prepared to race like hell. I was actually excited and felt so empowered.
Shit balls, was I humbled when I picked up a 35lb bike bag and pulled my rhomboid and trap at the airport en route to FL. Seriously?! I did crossfit all winter, I can squat my weight (I may have lied about my weight) I should be strong as an ox and able to throw that 35lbs across the room-but I won't cause my Fezzari is my baby and I could've been arrested for child abuse. Now I'm just carrying 12lbs of extra muscle slowing me down on the run and I can't lift my bike. I looked like this....
"STAY POSITIVE" I was screaming to myself while maybe having a little breakdown at the airport and contemplated heading home. I got 2 massages at the airport during my 3 hour delay. I still couldn't move my....anything.
Landed in FL, headed straight to packet pick up. It was closing - begged a massage therapist to stay and work on me. I begged so much and so hard it would've been super awkward had he said "no" and besides that I don't take being told "no" very well so it would've gotten even more awkward. He mine as well just said no and sent me on my way, it didn't help and I wasted $12 for 10 minutes of work. Ugh, why is Dr. Tom in Utah and when do I become some superstar and have a doctor on staff with me all the time? What, never? Shit balls.
Headed to my friends house about 30 minutes away in silence. I called my coach trying super hard to fight back tears, I hate awkward situations and people thinking I'm a loose cannon-which I am. My coach, Bob Seebohar, is like a super genius and...well, I'm special. He's such genius that he's even smart enough to dumb things down for me and talk on a 5th grade level so I can follow the conversation and I don't even know he's doing it. He's probably reading something about quantum physics and macro-nutrients while I'm blogging and watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians and learning about the "kegel master."
Anyways, I was so disappointed that he pretty much had to talk me off a cliff. He said this to me "Use this opportunity to develop your psychological capacity and skills to improve your disassociation between your mind and body. It begins tonight." That's basically a smart and fancy way of saying "HTFU" (harden the F up) okay, got it.
Later that night I tried Chinese cupping, sounds kinky right? It's that thing when little chinese midgets suck your back like leeches (I love Stefan on SNL)
If you wanna read more about cupping heres the link. It helped SO much! Thanks Leslie for cupping me.
Felt awesome on race morning, I could move my head left to right but not up and down. That was progress. The swim was insane. With 8-10ft swells and not being able to hold my head up and sight I stayed with the pack for 750m and missed the turn...where the hell did everyone go? I saw one of the male pros and figured I must be doing super good! I couldn't believe I was going to beat Sara McLarty out of the water....(I hope you could hear the sarcasm) Every breath was painful and sighting was even more so, I tried to remember how pissed I was at my self at Nautica South Beach Tri for not pushing harder through a 3 foot swell, so I put my head down and fought against the ocean as hard as I could. I think this is what I looked like.
| I'm a good pool swimmer but put me in swells with alligators or sharks and top it off with pleurisy and I'm recipe for disaster. I'm looking for a sponsor to provide me with a wave pool and stock it full of sharks and alligators. I strongly believe this will take my training to the next level.|
Coming out of the water I knew I was gonna have to just put my head down and peddle as hard as I could and pray I didn't hit anything; I figured my chances were good since I crash more on the run. I made up about 5 mins on the bike but I'm positive I looked as crippled and just as hunch backed as these cute lil old folks minus the cute part, I probably looked more like an ogre on a bicycle but couldn't find any pictures of that online.
The run was mentally the hardest. My whole body was cramping and in pain. I don't get how anyone can run like this:
As soon as I hit the finish line a wave of pain rushed through my body but I was only supposed to HTFU til the finish. Mission accomplished. I had a great race and did just what my coach told me to do. We were both proud. I ignored the pain and pushed through suck. We had to change my goals last minute, I adjusted my attitude until I hit the finish line where I dramatically fell over and cried.
That is most definitely not gatorade in my hand.